Category Archives for life

Today Ruby is thankful for…

(This is an entirely unedited list, exactly as Ruby said it)

  • baby Ben
  • when I used to be a grown-up
  • Baconnaise
  • pears
  • the doctors
  • Mama
  • tea parties
  • cat book
  • my bunny
  • Papa
  • Bebe & Pop
  • big Ben
  • Rachel from circus class
  • Nana & Grandpapa
  • Aunt Ni
  • my bed
  • Mom-Mom
  • Kazakhstan

 

A Toddler’s Take On Death

This morning Ruby and I were sitting in the bathroom together, as we occasionally do. I finished up my business and waited for her to finish hers. For no particular reason I started singing “Ring of Fire”. It’s one of Ruby’s favorite songs, and I’ve got a tendency to burst into random song at random times.”He’s dead,” Ruby said after I’d finished the chorus.”Who?” I asked.”Johnny Cash is dead,” Ruby said. I was impressed that she remembered who sang the song, and even more impressed that she knew he’d died.”Yes,” I said, “he died a few years ago. But he lived a long time, so that’s okay. Most people live a long time, and then they die.”I’m not one to shy away from the topic of death with Ruby. Death is a natural part of living, and one of my goals as a parent is to give her a holistic view of the world. I told Ruby that most people live a long time, but some people don’t. And I told her that everything dies: people, animals, trees, everything dies, because that’s an important part of life.”But Papa”, Ruby said, “who will be my parent if you die?”This was an unexpected question. Not just the transition from death of random people to the death of me, but the more insightful understanding that if I died, then I wouldn’t be around to take care of her. From the worried look in her eyes, I could see that Ruby has a good understanding of what death means.I told Ruby that if I died, then her Mama would take care of her. And if Mama died too, there would be a long line of people who would be there to take care of her: her Aunt Ni, Bebe and Pop, Nana and Grandpapa. She wouldn’t have to worry about that. And I also told her that I would probably be alive for a long time, so she wouldn’t have to worry.”Will you come back?” she asked.I told her that was a complicated question, and that some people think I will, but that I think I probably won’t.”You should come back,” she said.”Well, I’ll try, Ruby, and if I can, then I will.”She paused for a few moments, thinking about it.”You should come back,” she said again. Then after a few more moments, “I love you.””I love you too,” I told her, and that is a great way to end a conversation about death.

State of the Toddler

It’s been a while, so I thought I’d do another snapshot of what Ruby is like these days.

  • Just this week, she picked up the habit of starting sentences with “Um,” which is strange because I don’t think Steve or I do that very much.
  • She loves singing, and often gets a song stuck in her head. When this happens, she walks around singing/shouting one or two lines of the song for hours. Recent earworms: Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Jimmy Crack Corn, The Farmer in the Dell, Row Row Row Your Boat. I should note she’s picked all of these up from people other than us.
  • She’s excellent at hopping, and does it a lot. She can hop normally, off heights up to about 18 inches, and spin 180 degrees while hopping.
  • She still uses her soother at bedtime, and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.
  • She takes one nap a day, from about 2-4pm. These days, she actually sleeps almost every day (instead of just having quiet time).
  • She can count to about 12 or 13, and is starting to grasp the idea of how counting actually works (one number for each item you’re trying to count).
  • She can recite the alphabet, but with several mistakes. However, she can correctly identify each letter individually.
  • Ruby’s favorite thing to play with is water. At a wading pool or water table, I can count on her to be occupied for a long time.
  • She also enjoys digging in sand.
  • She continues to have a very exuberant personality, with an excess of energy that leads her to shout, jump, and wiggle a lot. She’s rarely quiet for long.
  • Her memory continues to surprise us, and she often recalls something minor from weeks in the past.
  • She’s going through a phase where she’s open to many foods, which is nice. Things she is particularly fond of are: peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, cheese, pickles, nori, edamame, corn on the cob, and most fruit.
  • She still has (what our doctor says is) minor eczema on her cheeks and thighs that gets worse in the cold. The doctor says she will probably grow out of it.

Recent Twitters about Ruby

Steve and I both Twitter, and although we’ve decided not to set up a separate Twitter account for Ruby, we tweet about her a lot. Tweets are generally considered disposable, but some are worth remembering. I went through our recent tweets about Ruby, and pulled out some I’d like to highlight and save here. Click through to read them if you’re not already following us on Twitter.

Continue reading →

How to brainwash your toddler

In late December, we took Ruby sledding. Although she liked being out in the snow, she hated the sledding. Seeing anyone sliding down the hill upset her, and of course she didn’t want a turn.

Beginning on the car ride home, though, we engaged in some revisionism and began talking about how much FUN it was. Didn’t you have a really great time sledding, Ruby? Remember when we went sledding down the hill and it was so much fun? We kept this up for a few days until she firmly remembered it differently than it had actually happened.

It was another month and a half before we went sledding again (not counting a failed attempt where I forgot our gear). This time, Ruby was excited and not at all apprehensive. Even so, we were surprised by how brave she was. Not only would she ride down the hill with us, but by the end she was happily sledding all by herself! Even falling off at the bottom didn’t deter her. See for yourself:

Due to her small size, she went faster and farther than we did on the sled, and it also made walking back up the hill much easier (since she could walk on top of the snow crust, while we sunk deeply in). All in all, it really WAS fun the second time around.

Sledding